The Strand
I was 24 when Jonathan Butts, a college buddy, took me out for a drink after my dad passed away. We sat at the bar where he delivered his message. Over and over he went on that I still had my dad's legacy. At the time his words did little more than raise a question in me. (A big thing actually). What's a legacy?
I mean we all know what a legacy is; but really? It wasn't dad's job or his credentials. It was something much deeper than that. Nine years went by and my brother Pat passed on too. The legacy question reemerged this time more urgently, as I thought of Pat's kids and my own. Losing him so young felt like the entire family was being robbed in the future -the place where legacy extends. We were left to reclaim our essence, our name, without our eldest brother and trailblazer. Silence bears a truth that cuts through to the deepest level when we love through our loss. Those we lose are with us in that meditation or prayer, deep in our chests. If we can love beyond anger or blame we can transcend to a deeper knowing. That conscious practice has opened up new ideas to me. As I look at the family I can now say things about us that I never really knew before. The McKinney legacy, (our essence) is compassionate and focused. We are analytical in nature but also free enough to listen to our gut like artists. We like laughing. The McKinney legacy loves adventure and seeks it out. In our most focused essence we build a home and find all that adventure, wonder and humor along the way. I can see this in Pat's family especially.
That's my family. And to tell you the truth, I had only noticed them in passing before. I had been too busy before to bother. Life is still just as busy now but the difference now is that I can see the through-line of love, the legacy. I see it in those who have gone and those who are on their way. I'm part of that strand, knowing myself and nurturing the family everyday.
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| Jonathan Butts (center), always on the mark |
I mean we all know what a legacy is; but really? It wasn't dad's job or his credentials. It was something much deeper than that. Nine years went by and my brother Pat passed on too. The legacy question reemerged this time more urgently, as I thought of Pat's kids and my own. Losing him so young felt like the entire family was being robbed in the future -the place where legacy extends. We were left to reclaim our essence, our name, without our eldest brother and trailblazer. Silence bears a truth that cuts through to the deepest level when we love through our loss. Those we lose are with us in that meditation or prayer, deep in our chests. If we can love beyond anger or blame we can transcend to a deeper knowing. That conscious practice has opened up new ideas to me. As I look at the family I can now say things about us that I never really knew before. The McKinney legacy, (our essence) is compassionate and focused. We are analytical in nature but also free enough to listen to our gut like artists. We like laughing. The McKinney legacy loves adventure and seeks it out. In our most focused essence we build a home and find all that adventure, wonder and humor along the way. I can see this in Pat's family especially.
That's my family. And to tell you the truth, I had only noticed them in passing before. I had been too busy before to bother. Life is still just as busy now but the difference now is that I can see the through-line of love, the legacy. I see it in those who have gone and those who are on their way. I'm part of that strand, knowing myself and nurturing the family everyday.
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